I want to use a vibrator with my partner after the dirty talk started

I want to use a vibrator during sex, but I keep pretending I do not need it because I am scared they will hear it as an insult. There is a version of me that wants to be careful, and another version that wants to be touched, used, praised, or teased like a secret. If I ever act on it, I want it to be honest, consensual, and not built on panic.

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